Rekindled Hope

I just read a wonderful testimony a friend had written on Facebook and she had this lovely photo there and all I could think of was how I have doubted the Lord so many times. He knows my needs and wants, and when I have looked through my fleshly eyes, I must admit, I would be in awe when the Lord would come through on something I had needed! I can not imagine the vision through His eyes! Can you? I do not see myself as anything grand or even worthy of any blessing. I do not even see enough love in me or compassion for people but the Lord sees a diamond in the rough! I feel so ashamed when I doubt Him and when He comes through He will comfort me in the gentlest way. 

And he asked his father, How long is it ago since this came unto him? And he said, Of a child.  And ofttimes it hath cast him into the fire, and into the waters, to destroy him: but if thou canst do any thing, have compassion on us, and help us. Jesus said unto him, If thou canst believe, all things are possible to him that believeth.  And straightway the father of the child cried out, and said with tears, Lord, I believe; help thou mine unbelief.  When Jesus saw that the people came running together, he rebuked the foul spirit, saying unto him, Thou dumb and deaf spirit, I charge thee, come out of him, and enter no more into him.  And the spirit cried, and rent him sore, and came out of him: and he was as one dead; insomuch that many said, He is dead.  But Jesus took him by the hand, and lifted him up; and he arose.  Mark 9:21-27

The Lord didn't know this man but was willing to help his son, even after the man confessed his unbelief! Jesus could have chuckled and said if you can not believe then move on buddy, but this is not what He did. This man battled this spirit in his son since his son was a child. Nothing had worked all these years and of course he put his hope in man and this was all he seen Jesus as. Just another man. In his mind, all had failed but, somewhere down inside there still was a bit of hope that just needed rekindling! Then Jesus said, well if you can believe, all things are possible. There came the spark! Just a little faith building and then he cried out to Christ, I do believe, maybe just a little bit. O' Lord forgive me for my unbelief! Doubt set in. His past experiences had overshadowed his hope for the future. Maybe He really did think Jesus could help but now face to face intimidation attacked. Maybe he thought that he was unworthy or that there was no way his son would be restored. We have all been in a dry and thirsty place with God where the devil will attack with doubt and intimidation, but the lesson to learn here is, cry out to the Lord. This man was not going to allow the enemy to steal his blessing and neither should we! It was not stated that Jesus said anymore to the man but simply put forth action. Sometimes God doesn't need to speak to us to do His miracles, but He does require just a little faith! 

If ye have faith as a grain of mustard seed, ye shall say unto this mountain, Remove hence to yonder place; and it shall remove; and nothing shall be impossible unto you. Matt 17:20

Removal of the Black Cloud

November 29, 2011

I AM NOT WHO I SEEM TO BE... you see God took me and did some amazing things.  My views are different than yours, but yours still matter.  I have been angry and sinned, but have went to God for help.  I have thrown tantrums, but thank God He didn't shoo me away.  I have smoked, but thank God for making me so ill I can't stand it anymore.  I have said bad words, but thank God He refills me with the Holy Ghost to keep my words holy.  I have sipped on liquor, but thank God for giving me 'new wine' to sip, that I may enjoy the influence of the Spirit!  I have spread gossip, but thank God for teaching me to abstain from the appearance of ALL evil.  I have been on the verge of losing my marriage to pornography, but thank God for restoring my marriage to what He expects it to be; one flesh.  I have spoke against my brothers and sisters in the Lord, but I thank God they have shown forgiveness and have been an example to me.  I have been hurt and you never knew it, but I thank God for teaching me to love NO matter the circumstance, that my hurts are nothing to what He had endured at Calvary!  You see I am human and I am subject to failure but it is not my failures that define me.  I chose to serve an understanding God, even when the world understands NOT.  I am royalty.  I claim my heritage and refuse to stay down when the devil thinks he has won.  I refuse to let intimidation tell me I am nothing!  I refuse to let family and friends, who lack in understanding, place doubt of my 'birthright' in my mind.  While some see and make a mockery of me, they do not realize they are attacking Gods anointed and it is not my battle, but the Lords!  While some sit back and dwell in my flaws, I am moving forward, leaving all the filth, anger, bitterness, JEALOUSIES, hurts, worries, distractions, pride, self pity, and the negativity behind!  There can be none of this in my home to come.  God is a Holy God and will not allow such strife to enter in His gates.  What the enemy meant for evil God has surely meant for good.  He shall increase my territory and He shall encamp Angels about me.  He has thrown all my sin in the sea of forgetfulness and I now am letting go as well.  'Teach me thy way, O Lord, and lead me in a plain path, because of mine enemies. Deliver me not over unto the will of mine enemies: for false witnesses are risen up against me, and such as breathe out cruelty.' Psalms 27:11-12.  I will bless them that curse me and love my enemies.  God is Love and I shall spread His love all around me.  I do not know your story but my past was too much to bear WITHOUT Jesus.  There is a key to all this!  REPENTANCE!  I chose to serve God with everything in me, when I fall He does not kick me to the curb, but all the angels rejoice when ONE sinner REPENTS.  Turn around.  Walk away.  Do not touch.  Give it all to Jesus and REPENT FOR THE KINGDOM OF GOD IS AT HAND!  Repent for Gods word plainly says  'The Lord is not slack concerning his promise, as some men count slackness; but is longsuffering to us-ward, not willing that any should perish, but that all should come to repentance.  But the day of the Lord will come as a thief in the night; in the which the heavens shall pass away with a great noise, and the elements shall melt with fervent heat, the earth also and the works that are therein shall be burned up.' 2 Peter 3:9-10.  I want to make Heaven my home, what about you?

Ye ARE of God, little children, and have OVERCOME them: because GREATER is he that is in you, than he that is in the world.  1 John 4:4. My heart is inditing a good matter: I speak of the things which I have made touching the king: my tongue is the pen of a ready writer. Psalms 45:1.  I am crucified with Christ: nevertheless I live; yet not I, but Christ liveth in me: and the life which I now live in the flesh I live by the faith of the Son of God, who loved me, and gave himself for me.  Galatians 2:20.  For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.  Be not thou therefore ashamed of the testimony of our Lord, nor of me his prisoner: but be thou partaker of the afflictions of the gospel according to the power of God;  2 Timothy 1:6-8.    For thou wilt light my candle: the Lord my God will enlighten my darkness.  Psalms 18:28.  This woman was full of good works and alms deeds which she did.  Acts 9:36.  Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, slow to wrath:  James 1:19.   For the mountains shall depart, and the hills be removed; but my kindness shall not depart from thee, neither shall the covenant of my peace be removed, saith the Lord that hath mercy on thee.  O thou afflicted, tossed with tempest, and not comforted, behold, I will lay thy stones with fair colours, and lay thy foundations with sapphires.  And I will make thy windows of agates, and thy gates of carbuncles, and all thy borders of pleasant stones. all thy children shall be taught of the Lord; and great shall be the peace of thy children. In righteousness shalt thou be established: thou shalt be far from oppression; for thou shalt not fear: and from terror; for it shall not come near thee. Behold, they shall surely gather together, but not by me: whosoever shall gather together against thee shall fall for thy sake. Behold, I have created the smith that bloweth the coals in the fire, and that bringeth forth an instrument for his work; and I have created the waster to destroy.   No weapon that is formed against thee shall prosper; and every tongue that shall rise against thee in judgment thou shalt condemn. This is the heritage of the servants of the Lord, and their righteousness is of me, saith the Lord.   Isaiah 54:10-17.  Favour is deceitful, and beauty is vain: but a woman that feareth the Lord, she shall be praised.  Proverbs 31:30


A letter to my Friends,

Before the Lord had given me this message, I had been impressed to ask a few groups on Facebook to tell me a scripture they had thought of after reading my post.  I was unsure of Gods plan on this but listened to the Spirits call.  The above are the ones given and I now know the purpose God had for that very deed!  You see, we all to often overlook Gods word.  We want to figure things out on our own but in all reality we ALL need Christ!  Complete strangers whom I have never met had built a prayer just for me, using Gods word.  I know all of the Bible is for my continual use, but Jesus needed to show Himself to me; let me know how HE can help me.  This is my personal prayer, to better myself and to know I am protected.  Being in His covenant has great advantages and knowing my Savior has used people all across the world to get the point across to me, has been some journey!  I had forgotten Gods promise and was allowing other things to consume me and even through it all Christ was saying, "O child, do you not know who you are? Does my word not matter? Who is in charge here? I sent you The Comforter, but your faith still is weak. Let me give you strength. Let me lighten your load. Seeking approval of mankind is not what I have called you to do. Let me remove this black cloud so that you may see clearly and that it may no longer suffocate you."  I was not allowing God to be God. To keep yourself from being in the same stagnant place, I am encouraging  you to start SEEKING the Word of God.  Take scriptures that uplift and pertain to YOU and personalize them!  Claim your inheritance and know YOUR worth.  Speak peace in your life and surrender your worries to Him!  He will allow trials to strengthen us and that we may put our trust ONLY in Him, so today I say goodbye to the person, that wants to hang on to past  problems and circumstances that I can not control.  I am declaring FREEDOM.  I am letting patience have her perfect work and I am moving forward... here is what is left of that chapter and please join me as I welcome a new beginning!
With Love in our Lord Jesus Christ,
Sister Emily

Locusts and Wild Honey...Nutrition Gods Way.

November 13, 2011

Of course they picked the thick lady to talk about nutrition! You know something that I have noticed the older I have gotten, is that it is tougher  to lose weight, because by now my body and fat are just really good friends. It is true. It is hard to break up a good friendship.  Okay, to begin I want to start by reading this funny article I found online. The author is unknown.

In the beginning God created the heaven and the Earth. And the Earth was without form, and void, and darkness was upon the face of the deep.

And the Devil said, "It doesn't get any better than this."

And God said, "Let there be light" and there was light. And God said, "Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit," and God saw that it was good. 

And the Devil said, "There goes the neighborhood."       

And God said, "Let us make Man in our image, after our likeness, and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air and over the cattle, and over all the Earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the Earth." And so God created Man in his own image; male and female did He create. And God looked upon Man and Woman and saw that they were lean and fit.

And the Devil said, "I know how I can get back in this game."

And God populated the earth with broccoli and cauliflower and spinach, green and yellow vegetables of all kinds, so Man and Woman would live long and healthy lives.

And the Devil created McDonald's. And McDonald's brought forth the 79-cent double cheeseburger. And the Devil said to Man: "You want fries with that?" And Man said: "Supersize them." And Man gained 5 pounds.

And God created the healthful yogurt, that woman might keep her figure that man found so fair.

And the Devil brought forth chocolate. And Woman gained 5 pounds.

And God said, "Try my crispy fresh salad."

And the Devil brought forth Ben and Jerry's ice cream. And Woman gained 10 pounds.

And God said, "I have sent thee heart-healthy vegetables and olive oil with which to cook them."

And the Devil brought forth chicken-fried steak so big it needed its own platter. And Man gained 10 pounds and his bad cholesterol went through the roof.

And God brought forth running shoes and Man resolved to lose those extra pounds.

And the Devil brought forth cable TV with remote control so Man would not have to toil to change channels between ESPN and ESPN2.  And Man gained another 20 pounds.

And God said, "You are running up the score, Devil."

And God brought forth the potato, a vegetable naturally low in fat and brimming with nutrition.

And the Devil peeled off the healthful skin and sliced the starchy center into chips and deep- fried them. And the Devil created sour cream dip.

And Man clutched his remote control and ate the potato chips swaddled in cholesterol. And the Devil saw and said, "It is good." And Man went into cardiac arrest.

And God sighed and created quadruple bypass surgery.

And the Devil canceled Man's health insurance.

Then God showed Woman how to peel the skin off chicken and cook nourishing whole grain brown rice.

And the Devil created soda pops so Man could poison his body And Man gained another ten pounds.

And God created the life-giving tofu.

And the devil took the Woman through a venture into the land of cordial cherries and upon returning she asked the Man: "Do I look fat?"

And the Devil said, "Always tell the truth."

And the Man did.

There is much truth in this and many of you can agree.  As God desires us to care for ourselves the world gets busier and robs us of our proper nutrition. The devil has used various objects to hinder and attack us with.  So I am hoping we can put the liar aside for a while so we can learn some pretty interesting things here. I am not going to bore you with all the scientific details of our genetic makeup and what our body needs because I truly believe we all know the do's and don'ts of a healthy diet but I will add that I gave up jogging for my health when my thighs kept rubbing together and setting my pantyhose on fire now the only exercise I get is jumping to conclusion.

Through being overweight and the struggle from day to day I have learned to eat more natural foods. The Bible gives examples of foods that are good for us in Deuteronomy 8:7-10, For the Lord thy God bringeth thee into a good land, a land of brooks of water, of fountains and depths that spring out of valleys and hills; A land of wheat, and barley, and vines, and fig trees, and pomegranates; a land of olive oil, and honey; A land wherein thou shalt eat bread without scarceness, thou shalt not lack any thing in it....When thou hast eaten and art full, then thou shalt bless the Lord thy God for the good land which he hath given thee. This scripture speaks of water, wheat, barley, fig trees, pomegranates, olive oil, honey and bread. These are just a few foods from the Bible and I really love the last portion of this scripture; "When thou hast eaten and art full, then thou shalt bless the Lord thy God for the good land which he hath given thee."  What greater nourishment can we bring to ourselves than when we praise God for the good he has given to us?

HONEY

God refers to honey and/or the honeycomb 60 times in the Bible and classifies it with the very best fruits of the land. It is noted in the Bible that the great minister, John the Baptist, who prepared the way before the Lord Jesus Christ, ate a diet of locusts and wild honey. So here is so great information on honey.  The average American consumes 150 pounds of white sugar every year and when he tries to wean himself of it; instead of using honey he produces his own concoction such as saccharin or NutraSweet. The warning on the side of a “Sweet ‘N Low” package, which contains calcium saccharin reads, “Use of this product may be hazardous to your health. This product contains saccharin which has been determined to cause cancer in laboratory animals.”  During his research into the centenarians of Russia’s Caucasus Mountains, Professor Nicolai Vasilievich Tsitsin, a biologist and experimental botanist associated with the Longevity Institute of the then U.S.S.R., found a common bond among these oldsters he thought very noteworthy. He discovered that they were mostly beekeepers and that their principle foods were products of the hive. Their habit was to keep the raw honey for their own consumption and to sell off the processed honey. These centenarians, of course, lived past 100 years and some lived to be as much as 150 years old. I thought it also noteworthy that beekeepers suffer less from cancer and arthritis than any other occupational group worldwide. Under the heading, “Honey: The Perfect Food,” the following excerpt was found in the booklet titled, Healing from the Hive, authored by R. Elkins: Dr. Paavo O. Airola, author of Health Secrets from Europe has written: “Honey is a perfect food. It contains large amounts of vitamins, minerals, being particularly rich in vitamins B and C. It contains almost all vitamins of the B-complex, which are needed in the system for the digestion and metabolism of sugar. Honey is also rich in minerals such as calcium, phosphorus, magnesium, potassium, silicon, etc. This is specifically true of the darker varieties, such as buckwheat. The vitamin C content varies considerably, depending on the source of the nectar. Some kinds may contain as much as 300 milligrams of vitamin C per 100 grams of honey.” Honey is a source of rapidly supplied energy. Due to its perfect sugar formula it requires no intermediate steps for proper digestion. It truly is a marvel of God’s supernatural design. Apart from also being a salve and antibiotic, honey cannot have bacteria living in it.  Now we know why two-pound box of candy can make a woman gain five pounds.  It was made with processed sugar instead of honey.

LOCUSTS

Concerning locusts, God said in Leviticus, chapter 11, verses 21-22:

Yet these may ye eat of every flying creeping thing that goeth upon all four, which have legs above their feet, to leap withal upon the earth; Even these of them ye may eat; the locust after his kind, and the bald locust after his kind, and the beetle after his kind, and the grasshopper after his kind.  The idea of eating locusts or grasshoppers is repulsive to many, but keep in mind that most think nothing of eating a cow or a chicken’s flesh. It’s really a matter of mind-set. In ancient Greece and Rome, fried locusts, cicadas, and grasshoppers were considered a delicacy superior to the best meat or fish. These insects have enormous nutritional value. Grasshoppers, for example, are 60% protein versus chicken or beef with about 20%. According to author Christopher Nyerges, “When hordes of locusts destroy acres of crops, farmers should be counting their blessings and rapidly collecting locusts. After all, the locusts are a much higher protein source than the grains they’re devouring.” Locusts are a good source of protein, vitamins and minerals. On that note I think now is the time to let you know that dinner tonight roasted grasshoppers and locust smothered in a honey sauce...Just kidding.

So we take these things unto our flesh and that is good. Our bodies are the temple of the Holy Ghost and it is our duty and obligation to care for ourselves to keep healthy. What is on the inside comes forth on the outside. If your body is deficient in certain mineral and vitamins then your body will react in such a way to show it.  What about our spiritual food? Do you ever hunger for it? Or are you lacking in it so much that your character has become deficient? We should more importantly feed the Spirit within us. It should not be tainted by unhealthy influences of this world nor should we ever feel the devil is running up the score! We are Gods people and we were given dominion over the things of this world, including our flesh. When we have a craving of the 'junk food" of our soul we should run to the Bread of life instead.  And Jesus said unto them, I am the bread of life: he that cometh to me shall never hunger; and he that believeth on me shall never thirst. John 6:35 

We should daily pray in the Holy Spirit, so that the river of living water can revive us and give us strength to awaken our being. David said in Psalms 63:1-2, O God, thou art my God; early will I seek thee: my soul thirsteth for thee, my flesh longeth for thee in a dry and thirsty land, where no water is; To see thy power and thy glory, so as I have seen thee in the sanctuary. Daily we should be feeding ourselves with Gods Word. In Proverbs 19:15 it says, Slothfulness casteth into a deep sleep; and an idle soul shall suffer hunger. Laziness has consumed many of us at times, but we don't have time to allow it to cause our soul to suffer hunger! The Merriam Webster dictionary defines Nutrition as the act or process of nourishing or being nourished; we need spiritual nutrition, know that when we are worn and ragged and have exited from the devils candy shop that we can find nourishment in the Bible.  He restoreth my soul as it says in Psalms 23.

The benefit of seeking the Lord in prayer and feasting upon his word is not only for strength, but also for the regeneration of our minds.

Thou wilt keep him in perfect peace, whose mind is stayed on thee: because he trusteth in thee. Trust ye in the Lord forever: for in the Lord JEHOVAH is everlasting strength: Isaiah 26:3-4

It is good for our understanding...

How sweet are thy words unto my taste! Yea, sweeter than honey to my mouth! Through thy precepts I get understanding: therefore I hate every false way. Thy word is a lamp unto my feet, and a light unto my path. Psalms 119:103-105 (

And His word if good for our bones and gives us life...

Pleasant words are as an honeycomb, sweet to the soul, and health to the bones Prov. 16:24

My son, attend to my words; incline thine ear unto my sayings.  Let them not depart from thine eyes; keep them in the midst of thine heart.  For they are life unto those that find them, and health to all their flesh. Proverbs 4:20-22

It is written, Man shall not live by bread alone, but by every word that proceedeth out of the mouth of God. Matthew 4:4 

The bread of life is waiting to make us the salt of the earth so that life doesn't have to be bitter for others. That once they taste the salt they become thirstier and thirstier for more and more of what we have!  “But if the salt have lost his savour, wherewith shall it be salted? It is thenceforth good for nothing, but to be cast out, and to be trodden under foot of men. Matthew 5:13. Ladies I am asking that we do not become lazy and allow our salt to lose its flavor. As the world is hungry and can only be satisfied on what we dine upon. You never know, you may be the only Jesus some will ever see.

Tapping into Living Water

October 31, 2011

"There is something wonderful happening soon! Do you know how I know? You would say when it rains it pours but I know that the Bible explains with every trial with move ahead and gain much strength, wisdom, and patience! So when the devil thought he would ruin my marriage, I fought back! When he thought he could turn my family against me, God turned the situation around! When he tried to attack my financial status by having my dogs put in animal control, God gave them back to me for free! When he thought he could discourage me through doubt, God sent blessed friends to lift up my faith! When he thought he could mock me, I found that even Christ was mocked but yet found His greatest victory while hanging on the cross! When the devil used friends to attack me, God used enemies to bless me! There is always good in every bad but you just got to stop looking at the bad to see the good! I great reward is headed my way and I am ever so thankful that God has considered me worthy to go through valley! In that valley I can drink from the rivers of LIVING WATER!

                                                                                           -My Latest Facebook Status Update

I could not let this go without sharing!  When God wants to accomplish something, the devil is always wanting to destroy His plans.  While serving the Lord we think things will be simpler but God never promised that we would have it easy.  He did promise He would never leave nor forsake us!  He sent the Comforter to us, which being the Holy Spirit, to help us when we grow weary.  I once would run to the world telling all my troubles when I should have done what the old song says, "have a little talk with Jesus.  Tell Him all about our troubles.  He will hear our faintest cry.  He will answer by and by.  When you feel a little prayer wheel turnin' and you know a little fire is burnin'.  Find a little talk with Jesus makes it right."  I know now through these very trials that no one in the world can save us when the enemy attacks, only God can.  We may gain temporary comfort with our friends and we may gain a sense of importance when we air our 'poor, pitiful situations to everyone we meet', but the truth is they can't care and make us feel important like the very one who created us!  Yes we will be down and out.  Yes we will be attacked for His name.  Yes we will have people come against us in what appears to be with in power, but they only power any man has is what God has allowed them to have and we CAN NOT take our desire off God and we CAN literally praise our way through anything!  I have learned that when the fiery darts of the enemy are coming at us our greatest weapon in war is PRAISE!  Praise God for everything the was, is and is to come.  This confuses the  enemy and greater more it brings much glory to our wonderful Lord and Savior!  He will dwell among the praises of His people and will give victory over these trials if we only put Him first.  So all who are burdened down today, sick, hurt, being ridiculed for what you believe, and those who have simply drifted from the Lord, lift your eyes, hearts and hands to the One above and say "Daddy I need you! I know you have placed your hand over me and you know I can handle this but let my faith grow and forgive me for any unbelief in Your power. The devil can not control me and I claim victory over this situation and Lord I WILL PRAISE MY WAY THROUGH. Because You alone are worthy and deserve my praise no matter how bad it gets. In Jesus Name!"  Let us rejoice during our trials, so we can have peace through them!  God will send angels to guard and He also has given the Holy Scriptures as a weapon in warfare.  Keep tapping into that LIVING WATER and soon this trial will be over! God has given you an abundance to drink from, even in the driest of places. 

Let brotherly love continue. Be not forgetful to entertain strangers: for thereby some have entertained angels unawares. Remember them that are in bonds, as bound with them; and them which suffer adversity, as being yourselves also in the body. Marriage is honourable in all, and the bed undefiled: but whoremongers and adulterers God will judge. Let your conversation be without covetousness; and be content with such things as ye have: for he hath said, I will never leave thee, nor forsake thee. So that we may boldly say, The Lord is my helper, and I will not fear what man shall do unto me. Remember them which have the rule over you, who have spoken unto you the word of God: whose faith follow, considering the end of their conversation. Jesus Christ the same yesterday, and to day, and forever.  Heb 13:1-8

Meeting Modesty

October 18, 2011
After receiving the Holy Ghost in 2007 I realized there was so much more to serving God than I had known before. Something had drove me to a place where questions needed answers and I would do what ever it took to get them. Long nights of reading the Bible, reading commentary, and many days asking questions. It was like I was investigating a crime and every bit of fact was worth the conviction! I broke apart all I could just to understand. You see this time was different than any before! I had a little extra drive in me, which being the Holy Spirit, and I had a hunger that consumed me. During this process I began seeing things differently. God had removed the scales from my eyes about many things and through His marvelous wisdom He was giving me much understanding on what we would call Christian standards. This was the big reality check!

I remember Chad talking about Gods covenant with His people and how we are to be saved and I remember him asking me to not wear pants anymore. He said that a woman should wear skirts and that it was more appropriate. I looked at him and told him I will wear what I want and he was not changing that fact!! I could not see where this had anything to do with God! "God loves me just as I am! I can wear whatever and He loves me." 'Nor height, nor depth, nor any other creature, shall be able to separate us from the love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord.' Romans 8:38-39 (KJV). He will love us no mater what but that doesn't mean He will approve of everything we do!

While working at Kroger a guy there would come to me and whisper comments in regards to my butt. It was humiliating and his words were of sick thinking. I hated it. Ugh! What was I to do. Before I found God I didn't mind filthy communications from those whom I was seeking attention from, but over time as God healed my mind I knew that is was not right! I was 14 and out walking in town wearing a new pair of Levi jeans! Maybe it was my attitude that I thought I was 'all that' in my 'sexy' jeans. Maybe I had just a little more bounce in my steps, but either way there were men working that did not hesitate to whistle and make remarks in regards to the shape of my body. I was a child for Heavens sake! These were men at least in their 40's and I remember wishing I could disappear. My intent was not to attract their attention, but in did. So here at Kroger I am feeling the same way. My entire life was a rerun and felt no way of escape.

I never told Chad about this out of fear that he would blame me for what this man said. I felt in some way it was my fault. How do you handle these things? Is there any way to prevent it? I mean, is it fair that young ladies are treated like prostitutes because they develop young? This is exactly how some men would make me feel while simply communicating with them. Fear, doubt and many thoughts began to enter my mind about my own girls. Would they find themselves at this very place in life? How can I protect them? God what can I do? The what 'if's' came in my mind and I don't know if this is normal for a parent but I know that your way of thinking should naturally change when your children are born. At this time they were only 4 months old and I was already worried that some lost, perverted man would say things or do things to them that could jeopardize their innocence!

Little by little God began dropping "clues" for me, but I was a stubborn sleuth, so I didn't always find them right away. My husband suggests how lovely and lady like it would be wearing a dress or skirt. Yeah he was losing his mind I thought, but something in me wanted to feel very beautiful and the thought was striking my fancy more and more. God showed me scriptures, 'the women shall not wear that which pertaineth unto a man, neither shall a man put on womens garment, for all that do so are an abomination unto God.' Deuteronomy 22:5. and 'that women adorn themselves in modest apparel.' 1 Timothy 2:9. Yeah I still wasn't getting it! So one day I prayed and cried out to God for solution to this problem.

Not only was it that I was battling a spirit of insubordination but I was also ignorant to the understanding of modesty. For some reason I could not grasp what it meant. Webster's Collegiate Dictionary 5th Edition defines Modest as lack of boldness; not forward or boastful; lack of display; moderate as in amount; and decent! God spoke in my mind and asked this one simple question. 'If a parent lets a child walk from the house dressed in tight clothing that reveals all their assets or in clothes that barely cover their skin, and this child is raped whose fault is it? The person who raped the child or the parent who allowed the child to reveal so much of their bodies?' What?! Why would God be so blunt? I can tell you why! Because it is that important to God! Modesty is so important that not only is it for our benefit but for our children as well! Was this enough to convince me that changing the way I dressed would change my situation?

LASCIVIOUSNESS
This one word in my meeting with modesty really began opening my eyes even further! I bet 85% of the people reading this have absolutely no idea what this word is. I didn't, but knew I read it at least in six different verses. I knew it must have been very important for God to really direct and pull me towards it. Webster's Collegiate Dictionary 5th Edition simply defines Lasciviousness as wanton; lewd; lustful; Tending to produce lewd emotions. So lets further look at the word lewd. Lewd is defined as lustful and unchaste. Okay, now we are really getting somewhere now but I was not sure really what unchaste meant so once again lets look at the definition to further understand. Chaste means celibate and amazingly Pure in thought and act; modest. So to be unchaste is being immodest and lewd. So in Mark 7:22-23 Jesus says Thefts, covetousness, wickedness, deceit, lasciviousness, an evil eye, blasphemy, pride, foolishness: All these evil things come from within, and defile the man. He was saying that lewd, lustful, those producing lewd emotions, and immodesty is in the same category as theft, wickedness, blasphemy and pride which defiles the man! In Galations 5:19-21 the Bible says, Now the works of the flesh are manifest, which are these; Adultery, fornication, uncleanness, lasciviousness, Idolatry, witchcraft, hatred, variance, emulations, wrath, strife, seditions, heresies, Envyings, murders, drunkenness, revellings, and such like: of the which I tell you before, as I have also told you in time past, that they which do such things shall not inherit the kingdom of God. Once again lasciviousness has been categorized with evil and in this scripture it clearly states that those who are lascivious, shall not inherit the kingdom of God!

My body was on display wearing jeans! I was causing many men to see the shape of my butt and thighs and even worse causing them to lust! I was producing lewd emotions in men and this was against Gods word! I had been a lascivious woman and God loved me enough to reveal this to me so that I would have the opportunity to repent from this sin and change according to His word. We should examine ourselves and make it a point to correct anything that would cause men or women to falter. This would even include, but not limited to women wearing shirts that show all her 'baby feeding goods' and even men wearing the A shirts showing ALL their masculinity! God did not make us to look like hoochies and prostitutes, or even desire for us to tempt one another. I seen this very clearly and realized I was needing to listen to God, so a 'skirt girl' I became!

Time has elapsed and I have been ridiculed and made fun because it is considered 'weird' in society for a woman to look like a woman! I consider it 'weird' that some women look like men. God set guidelines to distinguish men from women and I won't even go in the history of everything, but I will simply state that until the 1920's it was taboo to see a woman in anything other that a dress or skirt! God never changed His guidelines, only rebellious mankind did. I am thankful I chose to listen to God and wear that which pertains to a woman! It is liberating to me as a woman to have a new since of self worth and to know that only my husband will be entertained by the beauty of my being. I am highly respected by strangers now because of my appearance and another added bonus is that when someone see's me in the stores or offices they know me to be a Christian by my 'uniform'. We are to look and act differently from the world and I count it a joy to worship God in the way I dress. I know He is pleased!

Do not be blind to the clues God gives to you and for those who have taken a stand and proudly claimed their modest heritage, God bless you! Their is NO shame in not revealing yourself! There is NO shame in looking like a lady! There is NO shame in respecting yourself in a way to protect yourself from the perverse spirits in this world! You defend yourself and say to that devil...I AM NOT FOR SALE! You see I no longer fear what perverted men think about me because I give them no reason to think anything! I came to Christ packing much garbage in my life. He took it all away and so why in the world would I continue to wear what would remind me of the old me? I am Princess Emily Mary Elizabeth Manica and I am now clothed in royalty and in a new image because my Father is The King! Now looking back I laugh thinking "why didn't I get it the first time?". I guess maybe God wanted me to dig deeper and to fully appreciate Him planning my meeting with modesty. He just likes to know He is still the greatest and like any dad, becomes proud when His children make wise choices!



I love you all and please post an idea you have for future posts! I would love to see what the world would like to know about the Bible, me, or my family! Lord bless.

Escape From Bitterness

September 16, 2011
'The escape route for bitterness leads to the Cross, where the only one who had the right to be bitter, wasn't.' I hadn't been in church very long and was taking every note I could at our ladies Bible studies. This was a quote from one of the weekly studies and I never forgot it! It stood out so bluntly, so much so I can't tell you anything else about our study. God for several months has been teaching me somethings and letting go of situations has been the most crucial. When we are hurt or have been done wrong by someone we end up with two basic options. Forgive and move on or be bitter and never move. We become consumed with the torment of the mind that we can't seem to break free. The enemy will use this tactic to draw division among Gods people which acts as cancer. It spreads slowly to the point we can't enjoy life because of the pain.

I was reading in the Old Testament in the book of Numbers chapter 5 about how if the husband of the wife became jealous and suspected her to be sleeping with someone that the husband was to bring her to the priest and they did what was called "the trial of jealousy". In the ceremony the wife would drink a mix of Holy water and dust from the tabernacle floor. This was called 'bitter water' and if she has been defiled then a curse would be placed upon her. You see, only the pure at heart survived this. Now I know this is talking about adultery but I couldn't help but notice three things about this that relates to all bitterness; jealousy, defiled, and cursed.

JEALOUSY
When bitterness attacks it starts with a conflict then settles as we feel we can control this and it ends with evil thoughts and jealous acts. We can never see the good in the person who is on the opposing side because the devil has convinced us that they are only out to get us and they think they are better than us. So this rage bubbles inside and becomes 'bitter' tasting. It doesn't settle well with our body or spirit. It is a form of spiritual indigestion that cause us to lack in sleep because it wants to regurgitate. This jealousy causes unholy ambition in those affected by it. Our motives are not pleasing to God! The Holy Spirit inside us can not swallow this and therefore wants it gone! But we will keep holding it in because we think it will pass. We can't rid ourselves from this alone.

Who is a wise man and endued with knowledge among you? let him shew out of a good conversation his works with meekness of wisdom. But if ye have bitter envying and strife in your hearts, glory not, and lie not against the truth. This wisdom descendeth not from above, but is earthly, sensual, devilish. For where envying and strife is, there is confusion and every evil work. But the wisdom that is from above is first pure, then peaceable, gentle, and easy to be intreated, full of mercy and good fruits, without partiality, and without hypocrisy. And the fruit of righteousness is sown in peace of them that make peace.  James 3:13-18 

for love is strong as death; jealousy is cruel as the grave: the coals thereof are coals of fire, which hath a most vehement flame.  Song 8:6 

DEFILED
We have defiled our very being. Jesus said in Matthew 15:18-19, 'But those things which proceed out of the mouth come forth from the heart; and they defile the man. For out of the heart proceed evil thoughts...' You see those evil thoughts have now been manipulating us. We become hurt and feel that retaliation is appropriate. We may begin saying things about them or telling others our story over and over, thinking this will serve justice. When words come out cold and ugly about a person, it doesn't really serve justice now does it? Where is God in all that? 'Out of the abundance of the heart the mouth speaks'. Matthew 12:24. Defiled simply means spoiled, desecrate, and profane. God cannot accept a defiled being in Heaven for Heaven is perfect! God separates the good from the wicked and there is no good in wicked. Hanging on to a bitter state of mind will eventually cause us to be defiled and cut off from God if we don't repent.

My mouth shall speak of wisdom; and the meditation of my heart shall be of understanding.  Psalms 49:3 

Create in me a clean heart, O God; and renew a right spirit within me. Cast me not away from thy presence; and take not thy holy spirit from me.  Psalms 51:10-11 

Know ye not that ye are the temple of God, and that the Spirit of God dwelleth in you? If any man defile the temple of God, him shall God destroy; for the temple of God is holy, which temple ye are. 1 Corinthians 3:16-17 

CURSED
As this progresses we then walk around full of disease. Because of our stubbornness we begin to lose those near us. A barrier forms around us called negativity. This hinders the move of God in our life and affects everyone that is around us. This is a curse that we have brought upon ourselves. Our work in the Lord becomes in vain and nothing prospers. Our everyday challenge seems unbearable. Life is now to difficult. Prayer has diminished because we feel guilty at the emotions we have held on to. We feel God can't do anything to help and we were so rotten that He would turn us away. We now are bringing destruction upon ourselves because of not willing to let it go and show forgiveness. We are cursed by our own hands and this will cause us to be apart from the Lord. He is willing to help us based upon our willingness to allow Him.

And might not be as their fathers, a stubborn and rebellious generation; a generation that set not their heart aright, and whose spirit was not steadfast with God.  Psalms 78:8 

Cursed be he that doeth the work of the Lord deceitfully  Jer 48:10 

For as many as are of the works of the law are under the curse: for it is written, Cursed is every one that continueth not in all things which are written in the book of the law to do them.  Gal 3:10 

This is very serious and we all are subject to failure! When we feel bitterness creeping in the first thing that needs to be done is go straight to Jesus. Lay it at His feet and then ask Him to help us forgive the other person. Then we need to go to that person. It sounds easier than it really is but the truth is it will work out! I have been told many times that God can't bless a mess but I disagree! When else can a person fully appreciate the blessings of the Lord? When God delivers you from the mess you made, that is the beginning of an abundance of blessings! Imagine your best friend has been battling lung cancer for years and God in a instant performed the miraculous. What a beautiful thought to know she would live longer and be a testimony to the world isn't it? Apply this same thought to yourself as God heals you from bitterness! You can breathe again. You have joy again and further more you have life again. We need to equip ourselves with the whole armor of God and be prepared as the devil is seeking whom he may devour. Be aware and alert and take the initial steps to protect ourselves. We have a way out and that is through Christ Jesus. We can't allow the bitterness of our wounds to produce jealousy that will defile the body and cause our lives to be cursed!

Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need. Heb 4:16

Bless them that curse you and pray for them which despitefully use you.  Luke 6:28 

God is our refuge and strength, a very present help in trouble.  Psalms 46:1 

Trust in him at all times; ye people, pour out your heart before him: God is a refuge for us Psalms 62:8 

My flesh and my heart faileth: but God is the strength of my heart, and my portion for ever  Psalms 73:26 

And when ye stand praying, forgive, if ye have ought against any: that your Father also which is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. But if ye do not forgive, neither will your Father which is in heaven forgive your trespasses.  Mark 11:25-26 

Bi-Polar.....DEFEATED!

September 11, 2011
From the age of fourteen I had been medicated to treat Bi-Polar disorder and when everything seemed to fail God was still trying to get my attention. I was becoming a person that was intolerable and had no direction in my life. I was seeking for attention and had mastered manipulation beyond compare. One day I was excited about life and doing what I could to enjoy it and the next day I was sick with worry and confusion. I had started working when I was sixteen and would take the money and buy things for my mom or a friend I had hurt. This alone was like an addiction, Money in, money out. My idea to this was I could please everyone and be loved and the more I would give the more they would love. I was excessively spending and even buying things that were unimaginable ridiculous! Disco lights for my sister, haircuts for all my friends, drugs, and even a guitar for my mom because she said it reminded her of one she had as a little girl. Mom never could play a guitar anyway! I was always taking people out to eat and paying for alcohol. I know this doesn't seem like something out of the ordinary, but it was more than once in a while, these shopping sprees were happening everyday! At least until the depression would hit, then shopping was on hold until my next manic phase.

Then I would be so unstable with my emotions that I was crying or contemplating the best way for me to die. I would become paranoid thinking everyone hated me and they were looking for ways to make me miserable. I would hide in my room and isolate myself from everyone. Thinking became my enemy at this point. I hated my life. Nobody cared. The was no reason for me to live and I questioned God as to why He brought me in this world. I felt guilty over all the money I spent and had nothing to show for it. I was angry and wanted to fight anyone over anything. I would get so irritable that life was too unbearable. I was on edge and people began to really notice. This would last from a few days to a few weeks. When I was feeling better again then along came the shopping. Now shopping wasn't they only 'release' I had. There were drugs and drinking and hypersexuality. This cycle would happen over and over again. I had become so predictable.

Medicines weren't helping much and the ones that seemed prosperous didn't stay that way for long. As I continued to go to counseling I began to open up about my past circumstances and began to think clearer but these Bi-Polar attacks kept coming out of nowhere! The attacks tormented me because I was treated differently by society. I had dealt with so much criticism by friends but more by family. I remember one night I was dealing with a headache and we were at my dads. There is a relative that was very young at the time and would cuss and say obscene things at that time and she came to Chad and said something awful and I yelled at her saying that she had better not ever say those things to him ever again. My dad snapped back at me asking if I was on my medicine! Saying that if I was the doctors needed to up the dosage! This was a moment I began to finally assess the situation. Was he serious? So now you are considered crazy or out of control because you corrected a child for vulgar talk. I think not! I began to think maybe I wasn't as bad as they thought. Just because you have a bad day doesn't classify you as Bi-Polar. I told Chad I have had enough. Something in my life needed to change. I began by not taking my medicine. Yep I said it, I threw it away.

That summer ended up being the best ever! I was full of life and energy. Chad and I went fishing and walked trails. We were so happy and things were wonderful. He was the only person who knew I had stopped my medication. I was continuing therapy, but never even told my doctor I had quit. I knew if I did everyone would have something to say and it was not going to be good. One day while at work my uncle was telling Chad how well I seemed to be and that he was glad the doctors finally got me on the right medicine. Chad slipped up and told. I had been medicine free for about four months and all was well until the truth was out. Relatives I never spoke to were calling just to 'check in' with me. I knew their motive. Then everyone was looking for any reason for them to tell me I need to call the doctor! It was a plot I tell you, they wanted me to be 'abnormal'! Finally my grandma convinced me to get my prescription filled and as the story goes, here came the emotional roller coaster.... again.

You can not imagine the image one has in this frame of mind, unless you are there, walking in the same position. I was so sick of this 'crazy' label placed on me and sick of family looking at me waiting for the next mess up. I had received the Holy Ghost by this time and felt a greater peace than before, but all these medicines were doing was causing me to walk as a zombie. I studied Gods word and prayed asking Him to help me to overcome this battle. Slowly the Lord would reveal things to me. I needed to forgive my dad for things that had happened. I needed to work out anger issues and I needed to trust the Lord more. One day I cried out to God, after returning from the doctor and getting new medicine. I said God how can this be? I have been on everything imaginable and to them nothing is working but Lord I know this is not where I am to be. I know this is not how I am to live! So I had opened my Bible up to 2 Timothy 4:7 and wept aloud to the Lord. ' For God hath not given us the spirit of fear; but of power, and of love, and of a sound mind.'
This was a spirit that was oppressing me and the Lord was not the one who had given it to me! He said He has given me a SOUND mind! I fell prostrate on the floor as the Spirit ministered to me and I cried and travailed. I had entered into a new realm of prayer as the Lord interceded on my behalf and I remember my whole body shaking as I spoke tongues different then any other. I remember sweat pouring and feeling a heat overshadow my back and head, as if someone had their hands placed their. I do not know how long I laid there but I do know that as audibly as one can speak the Lord spoke to me. He said to Arise and throw away the medicines as I was now healed and no longer will need them. I did just that. I said, 'Lord, I give you the praise but you know I am stuck with this label and Lord if it is not too much to ask can you go before me and let everyone else know I am healed? Jesus you have to make the way as they will never believe me.' As funny as this sounds, I really did ask! I wanted Him to just erase every ones minds of how they knew me and let that be it. Oh us humans are so funny sometimes.

I told Chad and made him promise to say nothing to anyone! I knew God would protect me and I knew He would go before me, but I never even imagined what He was about to do. I went to my therapy appointment as I always did. My grandma was my transportation and we were in the waiting room when one of the office workers called my name. She asked if I had been there before. I told her yes that I had been there off and on for the last six years. She explained to me that they couldn't find my medical records but that maybe it was misplaced so she would keep looking. I was speechless. I seen the doctor, left, and went home thinking if this was real. My next scheduled appointment was a month away. I would know for sure then. Arrived, signed in, went back to one of the rooms, and this young student doctor was asking me questions about my history. It was like the first initial evaluation process so I asked why the questions. He said that they don't have me on file. There were no charts on me. I explained to him that I have been there before and he looked at me in disbelief. Third appointment, the same thing except this time the doctor asked why I was there. I said, 'I have no idea!' She laughed and said, 'well I don't either!' We talked a while about everything, and she concluded that there was no reason to make another appointment and for me to call periodically to see if my chart turns up. It was like God erased the label away!!

So recently I was at the same place because of a mental inquest warrant (a whole other story!). I told God, as I went, I will not lie. I will tell the doctors everything He did for me. So as I was in the small room with a doctor to be evaluated, she asked me if I have ever had Bi-Polar? YES. Are you taking medicine for it? NO. Why are you not taking your medicine? BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE BI-POLAR ANYMORE. Has a doctor told you this? NO. How do you know you don't have it anymore? GOD TOLD ME! I wish you could have seen the look on her face when I told her this! She said sarcastically, God told you? How did He tell you? Did you hear a voice in your head? I thought for sure she was going to keep me there as I began telling her my story. She took notes and sent me back out to the holding area. After a total of four hours of being there she comes back and says, 'we have nothing to hold you here for, so you can go home'.

Let me tell you, when God does something He does it right! Oh you better believe I still have people trying to convince me I am Bi-Polar and I have dealt with a lot of silliness because of it but I know a God who is ALL powerful and He healed me completely from it. I am overwhelmed at his love for me and I hope that all these skeptics, that have nothing better to do but try to keep convince themselves I am crazy, will soon see that where there is belief, the is faith, and where there is faith, there is miracles! God broke this stronghold four years ago and I am doing great now. I have a clear mind and it has been a blessing to live life now without the fear I once had. Some people won't forget the old me but God has. You see, that Emily doesn't exist anymore!